Ways to Encourage Your Coach…

Ways to Encourage Your Coach…

by Dee Kijanko

“Amen” I whispered while reading the early morning Tuesday text of encouragement from NOC Wives.  How true it is that to be able to receive all our Lord offers to help us, we must lean in!   Our hearts and minds need to realize there will be anxious times “we can’t”, “But God” can.

Just a few days ago I had opportunity to “practice what I have been taught”.  This was the week I offered to host our grandson’s special birthday dinner.  I set out with great enthusiasm and joy to prepare an autumn family favorite dinner, birthday cake and pie, while decorating for fall and a birthday celebration!

Every day for a week I would go down my long list and cross several things off, with all being timed perfectly for the moment they would walk in.

THEN, it happened….

The morning of, I woke up ready to wrap it all up…and I noticed pain in my every step.  

Pain that would slowly increase to unbearable within an hour. My back was spasming so violently, my husband needed to practically carry me to the car to get to the ER. “Where your spine and your pelvis meet, is misaligned.  You need to do nothing for at least a week.  

“You have overdone, said the matter-of-fact-no-bedside-manner-at-all doctor.

“This shot, steroids and pain meds will have you feeling a bit better within the hour.”

Once home, I only had one hour before family and friends arrived.

The anxiety that filled my soul was threatening to turn into anger as I instructed “my coach” to do everything that was left to do. “Open the oven door, please move the rack to the middle, place that dish right there…the others around it.  Now, find the largest pan I have right over there, pour the cider and bag of spices into it, please.  NO! The pans aren’t in there…they are over THERE!” On and on my instruction began to sound like ungrateful commands. Here was the moment for me….I realized that the reason he had no idea where anything was or how to help me, was because he never had before! I planned and pulled off all family occasions and celebrations by myself,  just hoping and praying he would be there. That’s how our life works in our coaching world. Until that morning, I don’t think I was resentful of it, yet resentment was now beginning to build. Before an ugly statement referring to all “of that” came out of my mouth, I remembered what I read in my time with the Lord recently.

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God!”  (Philippians 4:4-7) And so I closed my eyes and whispered,

“Father help me please.  I can’t…But YOU can.”

The next morning we both were reflecting on the goodness, grace and mercy of our Lord.

Regardless that everyone had to pitch in to help, we enjoyed a precious family time of sweet connection.

I asked my dear husband to forgive my impatience with him, thanking him over and over for his help and patience with me. We had experienced “the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, guarding our hearts and minds”. I then read to him what my pen had scribbled after leaning in and spending time in God’s Word, trying to express my deep gratefulness for how He truly does bless us with the desires of our heart for connection with one another and family. Because, deep connection with us is what He desires most, too.

“But You…”

The turning point.
Hard prayers become softer.
Hopeless prayers more confident.
Sad prayers lift to comfort.
Guilty prayers arrive to mercy.
Anxious prayers melt to peace.
“But You, Lord my God.”
When we lean in;
When we whisper, “help me…”;
When we open our heart and hands;
When we lay
our sin,
our weaknesses,
our hurt,
our anger,
our burdens,
our dreams…
we see them in the LIGHT of Who He is.
Seep in to relieve.
Help us release.
Give us reason to rejoice!
The reality of Who our God is…
All Knowing,
All Powerful,
So very Gracious and Compassionate,
So very Merciful,
changes everything.
I am weak,
But He is strong.
“The One Who calls us is FAITHFUL,



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